Msia

I love this book so much and I certainly cannot afford to lose it. The path of life that I have spent with you all has been great. You watched me growing, stood by my side when things were not going the way I wanted it to be, and encouraged me when I was down, smiled and laughed with me. I never even dreamt and imagined that I could be here in Malaysia and be blessed so abundantly in the fellowship with God and you all. I love Malaysia and if I am being given an opportunity to settle down in Malaysia, I would be very keen to take it. Even though many people are saying bad things about Malaysia and complaining about how unjust and corrupted Msia is, I still love Malaysia. No one can change my mind. The reason being is that I grew here, I encounter God here (God becoming more real and I know how it means to have my faith set on Him; and I know how painful it is to watch people living their life without knowing Christ; and I know the feeling of winning one soul to Christ; and I know that His words are the powerful weapon that I can use to win the battlefield that I was and am in right now, etc).

Sighed, I am leaving soon. I am going to Indonesia. Not that I don’t like Indonesia, but there is something I fear of when I am at home. I wanted to spill it out here but I choose not to because it seems to suggest that I agree and am confirming that it’s gonna take placed (it’s like giving a way to the devil to set a stronghold on me). Instead of staying in fear and anxiety, I choose to swift my mind to God’s promises. He promised me and I know He’s going to carry it out.

Anyway, even though I will not be able to spend my time with you all as I used to be, you remain in my heart forever. The chapter of my life is just begun. My battlefield is going to be harder but it is not going to discourage me in one way or another. I know it is hard but it does not mean I should give up. If God never ever thought to give up on me, why should I give up? Right? Through Him, I can do all things.

So guys, YOU DO MEAN A LOT TO ME. I DO love you all with all my heart. you have left your footprints in my heart. I don’t have anything to offer but my friendship and a prayer that we all grow in our faith and persevere though the journey is tough.

I don’t want to say goodbye because I know we will meet one day. So I should say ‘cya soon okie’

battlefield

I really wish i can talk to someone freely without hiding anything.
and being truthful in spilling out this battlefield of mine.
someone that i can be accountable to.
i hate the way i am right now.
being someone that i hate the most in my life.
being someone that i really wish will never exist.

but God is awesome
He never ever leave me
He left me His promise that really encouraged me
"we are hard-pressed on every side
but not crushed. perplexed but not destroyed"

i still have a long way to go
i choose not to be discouraged by the situation where i am in rite now
because i know i'll be renewed each day to be a person he formed me to be
but i still need that someone, just to be accountable to
i pray that God will place someone for me

=(

so sad and dissappointed. sighed.

btw, i missed hobart, OCF, its weather, foods, scenaries, bays, beaches, its ugly looking trees, boats, and in particular i miss alice, jason wong, shaun, travis, terence, yingqi, etc..sighed

L-O-V-E

have you ever wondered why God's love is different from ours? beside the fact that He is God, there is something unique that makes God's love is so unconditional. it is written in 1 John 4:18 that "there is no fear in love. but perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. the one who fears is not made perfect in love". surprised about it? you may or may not surprise to find that very essential piece of facts, but i tell you, i am surprised.

the reason being is " it is revealed that God never fears to give His life for us even though He certainly knew that because of our human nature we would fail Him or reject or hurt Him in any way." Instead, He was bold to go to the cross to be nailed for our sins so that His love can be made perfect and we could live through him and through his love (1 John 4:9).

do u wonder what it means "so we could live through Him?" as a flesh, we are weak and tend to sin and our love (to one another and to God) is a conditional one. unlike our love, God's love is unconditional and has already made perfect because He does not fear to love us in the first place despite very fact that i have stated in the foregoing paragraph. and He commands us to love one another so that he lives in us and we in Him. note that the verse 11 is a compulsory. it does not give us a choice either to love or hate or be neutral. it rather commands us that 'we ought to love one another." and as we are flesh, we'll in one way or another fail to do it if we are relying on our strength. so basically it comes back to the basic, get our first love to God be refreshed everyday and everytime. if that first love keeps refreshed within us, we will surely capable of loving one another and also to do all things that God has assigned us to do. In short, that verse tells us that God is the only and one role model that we should follow because he has overcame the world (everything you could possibly or impossibly think of).

so if we love one another, God's love makes complete in us. why? God is love and if we love one another, God lives in us and therefore we can be called love (we become more and more like God - God is love..) as well because we are the forms of God's love. we become hungry to do what God loves to do which is all about reaching out, caring for the needy, laying down your life for those you want to win for Christ, etc...i bet you know i mean.

awesome, i learn alot today. how about you? wanna share some with me? i'd be very keen to hear from you my dear friends.

may God touch your life everyday and may you find Joy in His presence. with lots of love, hugs and kisses i end this entry

5 of them

I'm proud to say that i have 5 brothers and sisters and even proud to say that I'm the first born. i can easily whack them.haha just joking. it is rather a big responsibility because i have to be a role model for them which is not easy i should say. but sadly to say sometimes they don't listen to me. instead they bullied me. all over my body can have lots of bruises because they played so rough. sighed. but when i'm seriously angry, they don't dare to talk back to me. that's good because they show respect to me.

this one is rather hard to deal with but i manage to deal with him somehow. one fact that makes me frustrating sometimes is that people always mistaken that he's the first born and Not me. btw he's looking good in this pic but i'll show you his real face (well it was long time ago. a time where he was still stranded in msia). his name is christian and we call him Ian.

ahh this is his real face..the naughty face. can u see the pierce?...i wonder whether he's still used it when he's off duty. i haven't met him for a year already. and when ronal tobing and He met, gosh, it was really a nightmare for me. i cannot handle them. but i missed that moment so much

Now I'm really proud of him. he finally made it through. he's being placed in some remote place which i don't know where. he told me last time but i forgot because, at least to my knowledge, i have no idea that that place has ever existed. my mom has to shut me down because i kept laughing about it. anyway hopefully it can be a lesson for him.

that's my sister adrianica katherine cuddling on the bed. i like her name so much. her name is a combination of my dad', mom', 2nd brother's and my name. very unique. and she's tough. don't ever whack her, you are the one who will feel the pain.

that's my brother daniel and michael when they were still small. these two cannot meet because they will fight but when they don't meet for a day, they will start looking for each other. funny.

michael and agnes. this little girl talks alot and asks lots of questions which often time drives me crazy. one thing to stop her is to get her playing with me or scare her with ghost story. even though she likes watching ghost story, she's still scared hearing ghost story.

i heart them. i miss them so much.

New Recipe

Meatballs : Cumin, Oregano seeds, chilli, salt, oregano, rosemary, pepper, bread crumbs, egg. mix well all the ingredients with the meat into balls.

Tomato sauce : canned or fresh tomatoes, onions, basil, salt, pepper and a dash of sugar.

Cooking instructions :
1. fry the meatballs until the colour turns a little bit brownies
2. put the sauce into dish and put the fried meatballs inside
3. put mozzarella cheese or parmesan and bake them
4. wait until the cheese is melting and put onto the pasta
5. ready to be served.
6, very yummy

please don't be deceived by its look or presentation. it was too smoky when i took the pics. it was actually well presented and the meatballs...ah..im speechless. it was such scrumptious meatballs. it has its special aroma and taste.

btw, it was not my recipe. it was shaun's recipe. he's a good cook and he's also very funny. greeting me with japanese's greeting but presenting me with the italian food.

want some? P P P